Adventure is Out There!

It's October 15th.  Thursday.  4:40 when I'm starting to write this. I'm drinking a dirty chai. It's a day. You know, your typical day filled with  shuttle rides, caffeine headaches,  and statistics naps. Yet.  My day was a bit brighter thanks to a best friend.  We only talked for a half hour, not even, but time doesn't have to matter.  She's one of the most empathetic friends I have.  When she looks at you, when you are rambling off your struggles, you know she cares.  And it means the world. In this fast-paced college-life, it's refreshing to sit, smile, laugh, vent about this common thing we all do called life.  I hope you have someone like that in your life. If so, find them. If not, find them.  They'll add the needed chocolate to your seemingly bland day. 

It's a cold, dreary, rainy day.  But, that's not such a bad thing, really.  Maybe waking up before the sun rises on these types of days is a bit painful, but these cold, dreary, rainy days are accompanied by genuine good. coffee shop chats soup beanies sweatpants yellow umbrellas rain drops on a windowsill puddles  rain boots tea the good stuff of life that isn't quite so good unless it has that backdrop of the usually dreaded cold, dreary, rainy day. 

I never did really blog about my summer. After making the trip home, I did try. I felt out of place, I ached for all of those I said good-bye to and I yearned to be at the place that had become my summer home. To deal with that, to express it, to find words to match, I tried to blog. The draft is still sitting in my list of posts, unpublished. Now, I'm sitting back down, typing up this blog post in a coffee shop by my apartment. My ice coffee is long gone. My waitress has long since left, I have a new one that keeps checking up on me. I'm in a good place. Not just physically (though this coffee shop is a delight) but emotionally and mentally. I love moments like this, moments you can just sit, smile, and think,"Life is good." It truly is. For those that I've connected with over coffee or over cookie dough or even those that may have seen my sporadic snap chats, you already know that this past summer for me was truly incredible. I've grown. I'm a diffe...

Sometimes, you come across the goodness of life. You pause, breathe in, and can't help but find yourself smiling. Here, living on a mountain, I'm breathing it all in, I'm living to the fullest. I can honestly say that I love it here and have been the happiest I have been in awhile. I'm running, swimming, looking at the stars, researching, learning, reading, laughing, loving, eating, It's beautiful. I'm surrounded by the most incredibly intelligent people in such an incredibly gorgeous place. I've picked the sweetest wild strawberries for goodness sakes! How can life not be good?! For the people that helped me get here thank you. Because this summer, these experiences, are the good stuff. and yes, I'm sappy. I'm well aware. But honestly, I can't help but be sappy because sappy is how I'm feeling (especially surrounded by these old library books here in the library). If life's feeling humdrum or lacking luster, go for a ru...

Sometimes the thoughts race. They rampage through your mind, refusing to stop, refusing to breathe. Questions question questions. The racetrack is an endless circle, never ending. No light at the end of the tunnel. But then you find yourself sitting there. Looking at an old fire place, framed by bookshelves of books. Old books. Books that smell of the wisdom they contain. You breathe in. breathe out. The deep bass echoing in your earphones absorbs you, encompassing you, enveloping you and pushing out those racing thoughts. You sit there. You breathe in. breath out. It's all good. Life is good.

It's been a week..a week and it feels like I've always been here, but at the same time just got here.  My typical day starts at 6:00 am, just as the sun is waking up. Dressed in all the layers and with binoculars in hand I either assist my grad student injecting females or search for nests.  These birds, dark-eyed juncos, are songbirds that nest on the ground. Yep, on the ground so they are predated a lot . This means that majority of nests fail (so sad) and we are constantly looking for more new nests or re-nests. When I found my first nest, you should have seen my face. It was the week's highlight.  That's in the morning. In the afternoon is nest checks, where we check up on nests and/or take measurements/blood samples from the nestlings/parents. These birds are so goshdarn cute. Today I held day 0 (just hatched) nestlings. Nature is incredible. Hands down. Incredible. These little guys are so dang small, so tiny. You can see their hearts beating.  ...

As I stand there, brushing me teeth, I stop. The most random thought just jumped to the forefront: "Life's really a boxing match. Life's a boxing match and I'm playing it all wrong.... Why am I throwing the punches and taking the hits? God should.  He shouldn't be on the sideline, waiting to sub in.  I take a stab at it, get overwhelmed, and then tap out.  Really, though, I should be letting him take my hits, take my punches." Weird toothbrush thoughts, right? I don't know where that came from, but it was something I had to write down, had to share (despite the already crazy number of life analogies out there).  Maybe writing it down, maybe seeing this weeks, months later will remind me that God's the best boxer there is.  I just need to trust Him. 

I'm sitting here, thinking on what to write. It feels like ages since the last time I was able to sit down and sift through my thoughts. At first, nothing. Life's been a whirlwind, but nothing quite stuck out, beckoning to be written down. But then I realized, spring break starts in two days. Wait...what? Not even two days. That is insane! Where did my semester go? Is that not crazy? It was January yesterday. At least, it feels like it was. Time's so precious. I forget that sometimes, actually no really a lot of the time. Realizing that, though, forces me to step back and take a second, take a second to breathe and realize I have a week. I have a week chalk full of potential. Okay, so I will have to study at the end of it for a test. Sure, I do have to work. But besides that, the TIME that I have to myself, to my own adventures is sitting there, waiting for me. I can't waste this. No, not time like this. So..what will it be? Hiking with Claire. Finish...

A new year. Instead of January 1st feeling like the brand new start, yesterday did.  Okay, yes, technically the new year began January 1st, but my new year began yesterday.  Today is day 2 in the 22nd year of my life. Wow.  Just, wow. 21 years? I've been blessed to live 21 incredible years!! When you ask people on their birthday, "Do you feel any different?" The response is usually,"Uhhhh no?" It feels like any other day. But, this past birthday, it hit me. It whammed into me and left me breathless.  I.am.so.blessed. Also, I realized this birthday, that to me this day is more than a celebration of my birth (weird and formal sounding, right?). It's about appreciating the people that brought me into this world (parents that's you) and about the people that have made me who I am today. When I look back, I don't see me. I see all of the people that have impacted me, all of the people who cared. And to all of those people, I do...

It's the moments like these that I almost miss. The moments that you walk right through because there doesn't seem to be anything momentous or significant in them. But those moments happen. Washing dishes, I realized I was happy. Content. Don't be thinking I love washing dishes, because those people are few and in between. I am most definitely a dryer. But I'm happy. My life is good, genuinely good. And it's this moment, this moment of good that I need to remember, to hold onto when life seems to crumble. There is peace in knowing life is good, in stepping back and smiling at your life. That despite the heartache, the grief, the pains, it is good in the end. Life is good. a throwback to my days in Tuscany

I stepped from one world to the next: sunny Miami to snow-covered Maryland. At first, I dreaded it. Every day, I joked how I could never leave Miami. I didn't want to return to , cold steering wheels, frozen windshields, a drafty apartment, chapped lips, red faces. Then, it snowed... and I couldn't help but smile. I'm left in awe by the beauty of it all! By the graceful fall of snowflakes, the quiet of the woods.. by the outline of the trees and the occasional splash of red berries. This isn't new to me; Miami was a vacation. I've grown up in Maryland and snow is no stranger. Yet. It is new. As my boots crunch in the snow, I turn into a three-year-old with the goofiest smile imaginable. It's plastered on my face. I look up, squinting at the bright, white sky trying to pinpoint a snowflake to catch. Then I remembered, I remembered something my friend had asked me. "Have you ever seen a snowflake? An individual, beautiful snowflake?" ...

I'm sitting here watching the twinkles of car lights on I-695. The lights on I-695 E are inching by while the lights on I- 695 W quickly disappear in the other direction. Each pair of headlights and brake lights is a car, a car with one, two, maybe five people in it. People that don't even know I've spotted their car from up here. People with lives, lives of their own. People with lives filled with heartache, tears, loss, failure. People with those same lives filled also with love, laughs, new life, and success. So many lives, just passing left or right on the high way, heading who knows where. Unaware of this weird girl up on the hill pondering. Do you ever do that? Instead of seeing cars around you on the highway do you ever wonder about the drivers? About the kids in the back with their faces fogging up the windows? Each car holds a story. There are so many stories that my story sometimes feels insignificant. Like right now, my story doesn't feel so muc...

Cold rain can be miserable. Especially if it combines with the lingering snow and slush that's already there. Especially if the air around you feels like your freezer. Yet. If you take a moment, the quickest of moments to stand and linger, to look up to the sky and feel the drops on your skin, maybe it's not so miserable. Maybe it's refreshing. Then again, you can wait for that sunny tomorrow.

The Before. Before the wrapping paper is ripped. Before the doorbell rings. Before the phone rings. Before the plane arrives. Before the toaster dings. Before they walk through the door. Life is full of anticipation. It seems obvious, but until recently I hadn't realized just how  much anticipation fills each of our cups of life. We tend to forget that sensation of anticipation once it's over. We forget because we become swept away. A week ago I sat in a room and listened to a speaker equate joy to anticipation. He wasn't happy with "Happy New Year" because he thought we should wish each other joy, joy found in the anticipation of Christ. The more I reflected on his words, the more I realized just how right he was. First of all, if you look up a synonym for the word "anticipation," you'll find joy. So there's that. But okay. Honestly, just think back to a time that you were waiting for something. Be it a vacation, a birthday, a h...

When you think about it, life's full of people. Yes, not mind-blowing. It's a pretty obvious fact. Moments that stick out don't usually involved me going solo. I wonder if the people in my life know that... If they know that they hold that place, that little reserved spot. Even strangers, I wish I could take a step back through my timeline sometimes and just say, "Thanks for making me smile." Which brings me to today. Weeks ago I was plagued by a nuisance of a flat tire and adopting four new tires. Since this lovely ordeal I have since been prodding my tires every now and then before I take off. Today, in this inhuman cold, they looked funky. Funky meaning deflated. Funky meaning Rachael is worried her tires are already giving up on her. So then I'm off, off to the Honda Service Center, with people that were just so very "helpful." Then I'm off to Shell, hoping they have someone on staff to just check, please check my tire pressure so I...

I sit here and think to myself, don't write it. The words don't seem to exist. How can I piece it together, describe it? It won't sound right. I've thought about this post over and over again in my head. Words seem too small, too insignificant, but I'm writing it. I'm doing it. I'll just say the almost unbearable. Buffy's gone. She had been sick for a couple months now. I had actually come home over a month ago when it seemed like she might not make it. But she did. Our family was together for Thanksgiving, Christmas, even into 2015. This past Saturday was the day. She is a dog. Okay, I know some of you won't understand because it looks like she is just a dog, a pet, we can just buy another one. That is honestly as far from the truth as you can go. She is a dog, yes, but she became such an interwoven thread in our family.  She's my sister. My parents brought her home when I was in first grade. I was what, a couple feet tall? Ohmy...